If You Give a Mommy a Glass of Wine

Author: Renee Charytan

Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform

ISBN: 9781532828768

Category:

Page: 40

View: 3870

Being a mother is hard work, and all mothers deserve a good laugh. If You Give a Mommy a Glass of Wine is a modern mother-honoring parody of a classic children's book.
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Are You My Wine?

A Children's Book Parody for Adults Exploring the World of Wine

Author: Reese Ling

Publisher: Ulysses Press

ISBN: 1612436889

Category: Cooking

Page: N.A

View: 8036

A delightfully illustrated spoof that demystifies wine and helps you understand the key traits of different varietals When Penguin finishes work for the day, he hurries off to the wine bar in search of his ideal wine. With the help of Bunny, Cat, Wolf, Bear and his other friends, Penguin samples and learns about the most popular wine varietals. Follow Penguin’s journey in this delightfully illustrated spoof that simplifies and demystifies wine while teaching you tasting notes, food pairings and other interesting facts.
Posted in Cooking

If You Give a Bunny a Beer

Author: Sam Miserendino

Publisher: Skyhorse Publishing Inc.

ISBN: 1510734015

Category: Humor

Page: 64

View: 4263

The first installment in Sam Miserendino and Mike Odum's Addicted Animal Series, If You Give a Bunny a Beer is a children's book for parents who drink too much. A humorous play off of the famous If You Give a Moose a Muffin, the book tells the story of a rabbit who had just one too many. Following the success of other adult-themed parodies of children?s books, author Sam Miserendino presents a delightful tale that will entertain readers with its charming combination of innocence and lack thereof. Featuring gorgeous full-color illustrations by illustrator Mike Odum that accompany the text, this heartwarming cautionary tale informs readers of the dangers of mixing alcohol and small mammals.
Posted in Humor

If You Give a Mom a Martini--

100 Ways to Find 10 Blissful Minutes for Yourself

Author: Lyss Stern,Julie Klappas

Publisher: Clarkson Potter Publishers

ISBN: 0307453715

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 127

View: 2698

The authors have compiled 100 imaginative ways they and their friends--including such celebrities as Kelly Ripa and Jill Hennessy--spend their time when they have 10 luscious minutes to themselves.
Posted in Family & Relationships

Must. Have. Wine.

A Toast to Motherhood

Author: Katrina W. Epp,Leah E. Speer

Publisher: N.A

ISBN: 9780615716794

Category:

Page: 224

View: 604

Must. Have. Wine. It's a modern moms' mantra, no matter what type of day we're having; when we've come to the end of our rope, had the best day ever, or simply just want to unwind. Along with that glass of wine, we often find comfort in knowing other moms are going through the same things we are. Must. Have. Wine. A Toast to Motherhood, is a collection of relatable stories by everyday moms assuring that none of us are perfect and we're all in this crazy race together. If you're looking for a reason to pour that glass of wine tonight, we've got 81 reasons you should! Always feeling guilty about something you did or didn't do? "Guilt Will Always Be There, Let Love Triumph" is the story for you! See Reason #4 Tired of your hubby putting the moves on you when all you need is another hour of sleep? Been there! You must read "Midnight Lovin'!" See Reason #58 Is the constant wailing from your colicky baby enough to make you want to lock yourself in the closet and bawl your eyes out? Read another mother's colic survival story in "This Too Shall Pass." See Reason #37 Think you're the only mom who can't brave the McDonald's playland slide to save your toddler? You'll laugh out loud when you read "I'm Not Lovin' It!" See Reason #15 With savvy wit and a healthy dose of reality, Must.Have.Wine. A Toast to Motherhood. takes you on the emotional journey we all experience as mothers, while gracefully offering advice and an aura of camaraderie. Each chapter offers stories that complement the ups and downs of this wondrous and challenging role we're all living: Chapter 1 inspires-Let go of your mommy guilt and embrace your imperfections! Chapter 2 amuses-Laugh out loud as you are reminded of the funnies from your own zany life with young children. Chapter 3 encourages-In your darkest of days it's comforting to know you will survive. Chapter 4 delights-Giggle at the fun and often cute moments of motherhood. Chapter 5 relieves-For those stressful and frustrating times...know that you're not alone. Chapter 6 indulges-Sweet tales remind us why we're blessed to be moms. Whether you're headed to a baby shower, looking for a holiday gift, or buying for a friend's birthday-Must.Have.Wine. makes the perfect gift for any mommy in your life: your sister, your best friend, or even...yourself. Together, let's raise our glasses to toast the laughter, the tears, and this zaniness we call motherhood.
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Monsters Eat Whiny Children

with audio recording

Author: Bruce Eric Kaplan

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

ISBN: 9781442439580

Category: Juvenile Fiction

Page: 32

View: 2938

Dad has warned Henry and Eve: If you whine too much, monsters will eat you. Henry and Eve don’t listen, of course. The only problem is, when the monster comes, he can’t find the right recipe for whiny children—and neither can his monster friends! A whiny child salad doesn’t work because there’s paprika in the dressing. A whiny child cake won’t do because the flour spills all over the floor. And whiny child burgers are out of the question because the grill is too hard to light up. Arguments and hilarity ensue. And just when our persnickety monsters decide on the perfect dish…the worst thing of all happens….
Posted in Juvenile Fiction

Pour Me Some Wine

A Toast to the Mama Sisterhood!

Author: Trina Epp,Leah Speer

Publisher: BookBaby

ISBN: 099094249X

Category: Self-Help

Page: 127

View: 8716

Pour Me Some Whine/Wine will be the first wine pairing book for moms. Each of the 80 stories has a “reason” for moms to pour that glass tonight. The stories are arranged by 6 emotions in motherhood, and each story also has a witty wine pairing that contains a metaphor or something quirky to tie into the story itself. It is an uplifting book that cheerleads and supports moms.
Posted in Self-Help

Where the Wild Mums Are

Author: Katie Blackburn

Publisher: Faber & Faber

ISBN: 0571321526

Category: Fiction

Page: 32

View: 4281

The day Mum didn't get dressed and went on strike, Dad called her 'a Wild Thing' and Mum said 'Cook your own dinner' and stomped off upstairs to have a bath . . . In this hilarious, touching homage to Maurice Sendak's Where the Wild Things Are, a worn-out mum finds herself floating across time and space to the place where the Wild Mums are. Dazzled by her party tricks, they crown her Queen of the Wild Mums and try to entice her to join their conga . . . But Mum has just remembered who she loves best of all . . . Lovingly illustrated by the award-winning Sholto Walker, this little book is the perfect gift for baby showers, new mums - or any mum who's ever wanted to go on strike.
Posted in Fiction

Nobody Likes a Cockblock

Author: R. Swanson

Publisher: N.A

ISBN: 9780692636756

Category:

Page: 38

View: 7073

Nobody Likes A Cockblock is a full color paperback children's book for adults about woodland creature moms and dads just trying to get their swerve on. It's 32-pages of inappropriate prose that will leave you laughing about your sad life. It's perfect for birthday parties, baby showers, baptisms, and of course, wedding presents.
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We're Going On A Bar Hunt

A Parody

Author: Emlyn Rees,Josie Lloyd

Publisher: Hachette UK

ISBN: 1472109848

Category: Humor

Page: 48

View: 7502

We're going on a bar hunt. We're going to find a cool one. The babysitter's booked. We're not old! Bestselling authors Emlyn Rees and Josie Lloyd also happen to be parents, so they understand the complications of organising a rare night out. In this parody of the famous children's book, two parents set off for a night on the tiles, and encounter a series of watering holes and bars before an alarming encounter with a 'bear' sends them running home to their children. Gillian Johnson is the author and illustrator of the successful Monster Hospital and Thora series for children. Her illustrations bring this story to life, gently parodying the original but adding an anarchic edge as the evening progresses. We're not going on a bar hunt again!
Posted in Humor

K is for Knifeball

An Alphabet of Terrible Advice

Author: Jory John,Avery Monsen

Publisher: Chronicle Books

ISBN: 1452121265

Category: Humor

Page: 80

View: 7165

From the authors of the breakout bestseller All my friends are dead. and in the humorous vein of Go the F**k to Sleep comes a laugh-out-loud collection of bad advice that turns the children's alphabet book on its head. Adorable illustrated characters lead readers down a path of poor decision-making, and alphabetical, rhyming couplets offer terrible life lessons in which O is for opening things with your teeth, F is for setting Daddy's wallet on fire, and R is for Raccoon (but definitely not for rabies). With plenty of playfully disastrous choices lurking around every corner, this compendium of black humor may be terrible for actual children, but it's perfect for the common-senseless child in all adults.
Posted in Humor

Where the Wild Dads Went

Author: Katie Blackburn

Publisher: Faber & Faber

ISBN: 0571332129

Category: Humor

Page: 32

View: 6227

The night Dad had a few cheeky ones after work, forgot the milk and tripped over the rubbish, Mum called him A Wild Thing and left him to it for the rest of the evening. . . . In this hilarious, touching homage to Maurice Sendak's Where the Wild Things Are, a 'tired and emotional' dad finds himself drifting off to the place where the Wild Dads went. 'Now party like real men!' he said. And there was never a manliness like it. In a riot of headbanging, air guitar and table football he finds himself at the centre of a great escape, but pretty soon he begins to miss the place he left behind... Lovingly illustrated by the award-winning Sholto Walker, this little book is the perfect gift for new dads - or any parent who's ever wanted to run away from it all.
Posted in Humor

Why Mommy Drinks

Author: Gill Sims

Publisher: HarperCollins

ISBN: 0008267456

Category: Fiction

Page: 352

View: 542

Why Mommy Drinks is the brilliant novel from Gill Sims, the author of the online sensation Peter and Jane.
Posted in Fiction

You Have to Fucking Eat

Author: Adam Mansbach

Publisher: Akashic Books

ISBN: 1617753823

Category: Humor

Page: 32

View: 2210

A New York Times Best Seller One of BookRiot's Must-Read Books from Indie Presses for 2014 One of Flavorwire's 50 Best Independent Fiction and Poetry Books of 2014 "You Have to F***ing Eat makes parents of picky eaters smile." --TODAY Parents "Adam Mansbach...will delight exhausted and exasperated parents everywhere for a second time with You Have to F**king Eat--another children's book that is most definitely not for children." --Entertainment Weekly "An equally hilarious ode to kids at the table." --Huffington Post "Parents, Adam Mansbach gets you. He understood that sometimes your kids just won't go the f**k to sleep. And, in his new foulmouthed bedtime book for parents out Wednesday, he understands that sometimes they just won't f**king eat. And he knows, well, it's really f**king annoying. So how about some f**king comic relief?" --GQ "A likeable variation on a universal f***ing theme." --Kirkus Reviews "A hilarious sendup of the eternal fight between kids and their parents over what to eat and when--if at all." --New York Journal of Books "If you're a frustrated parent with a picky child, or even just one who appreciates 'deranged' humor, especially humor that rhymes, this is a terrific read for you...Parents will enjoy a good chuckle and subtle reminder that everything is better, including parenthood, if tackled with a little bit of humor." --San Francisco Book Review "You Have to F**cking Eat, Sequel to Go the F**k to Sleep, Is Finally F**king Coming...It will arrive just in time to gift it to your brother-in-law, who, upon unwrapping it, will clutch it immediately to his chest and shake his head furiously at his waist-high daughter as she claws at him with her chewed up nails. 'No, no, it's not for you,' he'll say, laughing and crying at the same time." --Flavorwire "An uproarious spoof of bedtime board books." --San Francisco Chronicle "A 21st-century bedtime story for the ages (and all ages) if there ever was one." --Bay Area Reporter "Parents, when your precious angel rips you from your three hours of sleep to demand food that he won't actually eat, you'll want this f'ing book." --Mashable "Forthcoming new book by genius funnyman Adam Mansbach." --BoingBoing "Mansbach freely, fabulously curses out the uncensored truth; Brozman makes sure you'll recognize your irresistible, equitably diverse mini-mes with those all-too-familiar expressions, from utter disdain to overwhelming trust and every little eyeball roll in between." --BookDragon/Smithsonian Asian Pacific American Center "If your kid has never presented you with some new mind-boggling preference at mealtime, I suspect you're lying." --Persephone Magazine "This book is genius. It is what every parent is thinking when their child refuses dinner." --Old School/New School Mom "With this soon-to-be crude classic, Adam Mansbach has nailed it with his undeniable animal/child comparisons all cozily complimented by Owen Brozman's humorous illustration--we dare you not to giggle into your eggnog." --Curious Mom "Illustrations are just as enjoyable and the narrative again paints the perfect picture." --Roundtable Reviews From the author of the international best seller Go the F*** to Sleep comes a long-awaited sequel about the other great parental frustration: getting your little angel to eat something that even vaguely resembles a normal meal. Profane, loving, and deeply cathartic, You Have to F***ing Eat breaks the code of child-rearing silence, giving moms and dads new, old, grand- and expectant, a much-needed chance to laugh about a universal problem. A perfect gift book like the smash hit Go the F*** to Sleep (over 1.5 million copies sold worldwide!), You Have to F***ing Eat perfectly captures Mansbach's trademark humor, which is simultaneously affectionate and radically honest. You probably shouldn't read it to your kids.
Posted in Humor

Pat the Husband

A Parody

Author: Kate Nelligan

Publisher: Cider Mill Press

ISBN: 9781604330144

Category: Humor

Page: 16

View: 4056

Dorothy Kunhardt’s Pat the Bunny is a children’s classic, with millions of copies sold. It’s inspired numerous spin-offs for both kids and adults—but none as wickedly amusing as this clever interactive book! Every wife, girlfriend, and woman who hopes to be one will treasure it, and have endless fun playing with the lift-the-flap, touch-and-feel, pull tabs, and other highly designed elements. It slyly questions who wears the pants in the family, and lets women humor their men by removing the Velcro pants from the female figure and putting it on the male. Or, eager to have hubby say yes to your request? Then just use the tab to make his head nod! Since all men are really little boys at heart, what better way to celebrate (okay—roast) their peccadilloes than with a kids’ book format? Pat the Husband takes amusing aim at the oddities of guys everywhere, making it the perfect gift from girlfriend to girlfriend, as well as for bridal showers and anniversaries. Every wife will recognize the humor in the quirky characteristics played out about “husbands everywhere”—and find a reason every day to sneak a peek and pat!
Posted in Humor

The Very Hungover Caterpillar

A Parody

Author: Emlyn Rees,John Lloyd

Publisher: Constable Crime

ISBN: 9781472117106

Category: Humor

Page: 32

View: 3756

From the bestselling authors of We're Going on a Bar Hunt, comes another hilarious parody of a much-loved children's book. This time, we follow the quest of one man as he attempts to shake off his hangover, through eating whatever he can get his hands on, and annoying his family in the process. The perfect book for anyone who fondly remembers the original, but has now grown up and knows all too well just how painful hungover days can be . . .
Posted in Humor

Wine. All the Time.

The Casual Guide to Confident Drinking

Author: Marissa A. Ross

Publisher: Penguin

ISBN: 0399574174

Category: Cooking

Page: 304

View: 1200

“Can I just be Marissa, please? I want to be hilarious and sexy and smart and insanely knowledgeable about wine.” —Mindy Kaling A fresh, fun, and unpretentious guide to wine from Marissa A. Ross, official wine columnist for Bon Appétit. Does the thought of having to buy wine for a dinner party stress you out? Is your go-to strategy to pick the bottle with the coolest label? Are you tired of choosing pairings based on your wallet, instead of your palate? Fear not! Bon Appétit wine columnist and Wine. All The Time. blogger Marissa A. Ross is here to help. In this utterly accessible yet comprehensive guide to wine, Ross will walk you through the ins and outs of wine culture. Told in her signature comedic voice, with personal anecdotes woven in among its lessons, Wine. All the Time. will teach you to sip confidently, and make you laugh as you're doing it. In Wine. All The Time., you’ll learn how to: • Describe what you’re drinking, and recognize your preferences • Find the best bottle for you budget and occasion • Read and understand what’s written on a wine label • Make the perfect pairings between what you’re drinking and what you’re eating • Throw the best damn dinner party your guests will ever attend • And much more
Posted in Cooking

A Child Called It

One Child's Courage to Survive

Author: Dave Pelzer

Publisher: Health Communications, Inc.

ISBN: 1558743669

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 184

View: 7257

Tells the story of a child's abuse at the hands of his alcoholic mother
Posted in Biography & Autobiography

Bad Little Children's Books

KidLit Parodies, Shameless Spoofs, and Offensively Tweaked Covers

Author: Arthur C. Gackley

Publisher: Abrams

ISBN: 1613129912

Category: Humor

Page: 112

View: 8200

In Bad Little Children’s Books, illustrator Arthur C. Gackley creates hysterical parodies of children’s book covers from more innocent times. Many of these original books focus on life’s lessons, joys, and curiosities. Gackley cleverly takes the books’ classic covers and turns them into unforgettable, edgy, politicaly incorrect parodies that speak to the bad little kid in all of us. With a catalog of children’s book titles like Peeping Tommy Goes Cougar Hunting, Cousin Milky Is Lactose Intolerant, and The Blind Child’s Picture Dictionary, this collection will have readers in stitches. A fun read for parents, grown-ups, and kids-at-heart everywhere, Bad Little Children’s Books leaves no bad joke unmade.
Posted in Humor